Hi tumblr. It’s been months. So much has happened that I don’t even know where to start.
I guess I will start with the hardest part: we broke up. It still feels weird for me to admit it. It still hurts to think about it. I’ve probably cried every other day, if not every day, for the past 2 months. My emotions are so raw right now, I can feel myself crumbling at the slightest thing.
But despite all of that, I understand that this step was necessary. For both him and me. We weren’t at a good place. Haven’t been for a while. Him with his depression and me with my expectations. We just weren’t fulfilling each other’s needs.
But damn, it hurts. I have never encountered something that hurts this bad. I want him to be happy. I am so proud of him, for standing up for himself and taking the steps to ensure his own happiness.
I just wish it wasn’t at the expense of us…
I miss him. I miss the way we were in the past. And mourn for the future we will never have together. I just loved him so much.
Often times, the right decisions are the hardest to make. They are thorny and impossibly difficult to grapple with. They tear at your soul. They keep you up at night. And when they are finally spoken with words that never seem quite right, they spill out of your mouth, awkwardly, painfully,…
Went into the bathroom to wish him happy birthday and found him blow drying his underwear??? I’m confused….